Stay on Offense Climb Mountains

Attacking Adversity

Go Hiking And Find The Strength Within

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No matter what difficulties I am facing from day to day, when I get up in the mountains I find a strength that I don’t have when I am not climbing. I think it is one of the ways I connect with my creator.

Of course, you are outdoors in creation. Being outside in the forest aligns with our nature as humans.

The Quiet

There are places in the mountains away from freeways and even the sound of waterfalls where you can hear your heartbeat. In these places, I am rejuvenated. I find the strength I didn’t know I had.

Having places like this gives me a place to rest. Resting when climbing mountains is typically not what I do. However, in these cases, I make an exception.

The Clouds

Am I the only person that finds strength in clouds? Especially in the mountains where they hide part of a view or make a landscape almost spooky.

Everyone has seen clouds take the shape of familiar things or scary things. You might see a dragon or an angel. Somehow, in the mountains, these images are more powerful and can transfer that power to the person watching.

The Trees

I know I have talked about being a tree hugger before this. The trees surround you and I suppose that is why you hear the term “nature bathing.” The large ones are so old. I read once that old trees talk. It is just that they talk so slow you can’t understand them.

Trees seem so much more stable than me. Rooted deep in the ground seemingly unmovable. And I think you can borrow some of that stability just by being around them.

The quiet, clouds and trees all combine to strengthen the spirit within. So go hiking!

Bookish Weapon Number Twenty-Four

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This book by Barbara Hansen had a profound impact on me at a time when I was struggling so I am hoping it will be useful for you as well. With that in mind, I will highlight a few of my favorite parts of the book.

First, however, I think the author’s back story is important. She was paralyzed at 19 years old and spent the rest of her life in a wheelchair. She describes some of her challenges including getting out of bed every morning using an elaborate hoisting method. Then she loses her home in a storm. So she is very qualified to discuss overcoming adversity.

Internal Resources

Hansen’s main focus is on developing internal resources to handle life’s difficulties. She talks about creating a “steel core of spiritual strength. There are three important first steps she discusses: 1) Process the pain of the past 2) Choose our response to reality 3) Stop making ourselves victims. She says, “By changing our thoughts and attitudes we can modify our actions, habits.” This way we gain inner strength.

What I find interesting is that she does not tell you what attitudes you should have and says this depends on the individual as long as it “nourishes the soul and makes us better people.”

She says, “Memorizing inspirational and peaceful lines from poetry or scripture has given me the inner strength to get through life’s lousy times.” This is good advice. It does take a little bit of work to do the memorization, but it is worth it.

We All Count

Hansen quotes William George Jordan, in his book, “The Majesty of Calmness.” Jordan says, “ Man’s unconscious influence, the silent subtle radiation of his personality, the effect of his words and acts, the trifles he never considers, is tremendous. Every moment of life is changing to a degree the life of the whole world.” Consider that last statement! Every moment of your life is effecting the whole world! That is such an uplifting and serious thought. We all count.

Death, divorce, aging, being single are all reasons for feeling what Hansen calls, “terminally alone.” She calls for all of us to become aware and be the person for someone who feels alone.

Journaling and Books

Hansen doesn’t specifically discuss journaling, but she talks about “typing.” Here is what she says, “ At the end of the day I will often know that life is not right; something’s wrong. Having only this vague sense of discontent, I’ll not be sure exactly what I am feeling or why I am feeling it, but I know something is corrupting my peace of mind. Typing helps me pull my emotions outside of myself and place them onto the screen. The longer I type the clearer my feelings and ideas become, my paper psychiatrist has helped me face, sift through, and deal with the emotional pain that has periodically pounded my life. As thing gives form and focus to my ideas and feelings, I find I am no longer in the clutches of discontent. Talking to my paper psychiatrist gives me a clear awareness of what it feels like to be me.” She says this so much better than I did in my book, but it is one of four things that helped me deal with adversity. I called it journalling and she calls it typing, but it is the same.

She says books give her strength and pleasure. “The insights and inspiration I get from books “refill my pitcher” when my pitcher gets empty.” So grab a book. It can make a difference.

Faith

Hansen says that “faith in God gives us a desire not only to live but to live well unless we believe being alive makes the world a better place, we are going to have a hard time getting in touch with our spiritual core; unless we have faith in our own uniqueness, we’ll find it difficult to to have faith in a power higher than ourselves.”…”This faith in our personal spiritual value gives us staying power when life hands us rotten reality.”

I love the final sentence in her book after she discusses the importance of spirituality as an anchor in everyone’s life and the hope it gives us. Then she says, “This hope isn’t the certainty that life will turn out well; it’s the belief that life makes sense regardless of how it turns out.”

Bookish Weapon Number Twenty-Three

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Do you want to make better decisions and respond appropriately in more situations? Then this Elizabeth Stanley’s book, “Widen the Window,” is for you. It is a weapon you need in your arsenal.

This is a 400-page book so to pick one idea is pretty much impossible. So I won’t do that. I am going to give you the basics.

Basic Knowledge

Stanley asks that you read the first part of the book before reading her “solutions.” This makes sense because you need to be motivated to use what she suggests. She developed a course called MMFT or for short M-Fit and the book is mostly about the scientific and intellectual concepts that undergird this course. With that in mind, let’s continue.

She says that her “…window of tolerance to stress arousal was adaptively wired in response to my early social environment. It was narrowed during exposure to prolonged stress and trauma without adequate recovery.” Stanley had a tough childhood and then had more difficult times in the military which she discusses in the book.

We have two brains. The survival brain and the thinking brain is what Stanley calls them. They usually fight. It is not good when they fight with each other. The “thinking brain” engages in top-down processing which includes cognitive responses to things. It memorizes and learns stuff. Got it? The “survival brain” is “bottom-up processing.” “One of the survival brain’s most important functions is neuroception, an unconscious process of rapidly scanning the internal and external environment for opportunities/safety/pleasure and threats/danger/pain.” Its memory and learning system is “implicit.”

One of her main coping strategies was “suck it up and move on.” Some people have addictions or adrenaline-seeking behavior, disordered eating and a whole host of other things like isolation. She says these dynamics affect all of us and …they’re shared by anyone who fails to recalibrate their mind-body system after a distressing or traumatic event, such as a flood, car accident, or loss of a job or loved one. They are also shared by anyone who habitually over tenses their mind-body system during prolonged stress without adequate recovery, such as crashing to meet a deadline or working long hours over an extended period without some days off.”

Our childhood affects how wide our window is and works as a negative stressor as an adult. Even in daily life. She cautions that “By understanding how stress and trauma are a continuum, we can see how we might devalue things that are extremely stressful for the survival brain but “not that bad” to the thinking brain.” But, “…the survival brain believes the traumatic event was never complete.”

You might have a mind-body system that unconsciously craves a crisis. That’s not good

There is a lot more basic knowledge, but this gives you a decent look.

The Fix

Stanley wants us “to use our biology in a new way. By systematically training our attention, we can widen the window within which our thinking brain and survival brain work together cooperatively.”

She gives us two exercises to do. The first one, called the “Contact Point Exercise,” involves sitting in a chair and getting a sense of how it feels, how it supports your body and then you notice all the contact points of the chair with your body. You scan your body for tightness or tension. See if the tension shifts. Then you bring the sensation back to physical contact with the chair and she says to pay attention to three areas: 1) between your legs, butt, and lower back and the chair; 2) between your feet and the ground and 3) where your hands are touching your legs or each other. Then pick one point where you feel most contact. Then direct and sustain your attention at that point. Just like meditation, if your attention wonders ring it back. Then after 5, 10, 15, 20 minutes notice your whole body and notice if anything has changed. Higher energy? Less or more tension? That’s the first exercise in a nutshell.

The second exercise she calls “Grounding and Release,” which is a lot like the first. Get yourself into a chair, bring your attention to your symptoms of stress activation (she has a whole list f these in the book). Pay attention to the physical sensations. Once you notice that you are “activated.” Then notice that contact point again with the chair. Keep your focus on the contact point until you feel release from the stress or “activation.”

The idea with this second exercise is to “…let the thinking brain be the survival brain’s ally, by disengaging attention from the stress activation and redirecting the attention towards stimuli that will facilitate the survival brain neurocepting safety.

Rest Of The Book

The rest of the book is more or less typical self-help information. It is interesting, but not as crucial as the above.

Go Hiking And Widen Your Window

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Yes, “Widen Your Window” is the subject of this week’s Bookish Weapon so I thought I would play with that idea a little when it comes to hiking.

The author is talking about widening possible responses in times of stress. One of the ways to do that is to get out into nature.

Relaxing

Being in the woods is relaxing. Even when you are pushing hard up the mountain you can smell the wild strawberries, the bark on the trees, and sometimes if you’re lucky, smoke. Yes, smoke! So maybe smoke is one only I would like and a certain kind of smoke.

When I was small I would spend time with my father clearing land. We would dynamite a stump or two and then burn them. The odor from the stump burning is what has stayed with me. So whenever it is in the air it takes me back.

Getting Away

If you are heading for the mountains it means you are not worrying about work or problems. Your mind is focused on the climb. You leave your cell phone wrapped up in your backpack. Yes, I know many don’t, but they should keep it tucked away. Distractions like that are unwelcome in the woods and you will not be widening your window.

Unless you live close to the mountains, it takes a while to get there. This trip helps me detach from my life back home. By the time I am at the trailhead, I am in a different world both physically and mentally.

Use The Exercise

One of the exercises in this book is developing an awareness of the contact between our body and immediate surroundings. She has you sit in a chair for this, but you can do it on the trail. Feel your feet on the ground and the wind on your face.

I think you could even use the trail to release stress. When you reach a quiet spot, take a deep breath and exhale while imagining all of your stress and tension leaving your body. It works great and I have a particular place I like for doing this.

Your window a little narrow? Go hiking!

Bookish Weapon Number Twenty-Two

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William Irvine’s book, “The Stoic Challenge,” is a little different than some of the other popular books about this philosophy. It is, indeed, a challenge!

His book begins with what to most of us, would be a frustrating time at the airport. One delay after another when we need to catch a flight and we start to steam inside. Not Bill Irvine. He accepts it as a challenge to his ability to use his philosophy, stay engaged and improve his resilience.

Setbacks

I don’t think I have read any other book that uses the word “setback” more often. There is a chapter devoted to it. Actually more than one. He describes all the different ways we can experience a setback, the psychology of setbacks and how to use Stoic philosophy to confront them. The Stoics’ goal says Irvine, “was not to remain calm while suffering a setback but rather to experience a setback without thereby suffering.”

In his chapter on the psychology of setbacks, Irvine gets busy discussing anchoring and framing as they relate to Stoic philosophy.

Anchoring

This kind of anchoring is not like what you experience in Neuro-linguistic Programing, where you heighten the subject’s emotion and attach an “anchor.” Irvine explains it as a retailer selling shirts for $50 but then having sales of 20% off. This anchors the “regular price” at $50 in the shopper’s mind.

When it comes to the Stoics, “they would periodically make a point of imagining ways their lives could be worse…By thinking about how things could be worse, they effectively sank an anchor into their subconscious minds. The presence of the anchor affected how they subsequently felt about their current situation.”

Framing

Epictetus said, “what upsets people is not things themselves but their judgment about the things.” So there are six frames that Irvine outlines for us and that we can use daily.

First, there is the “Competing Obligation Frame.” You think someone didn’t give you something you thought you should get because they are nasty, but with this frame, you can step back and say to yourself that they may have had a competing obligation which prevented them from giving you what you wanted.

Second, the “Incompetence Frame,” Someone does something and you at first think it is out of malice, but with this frame, you realize they are just incompetent.

Third, the Storytelling Frame,” allows you to “write your behavior” by focusing on how the setback could turn out well in the long run.

Fourth, the Comedic Frame, is when you use humor to offset the setback. Simple and it works.

Fifth, the Game Frame, is where you think about your setback as just a part of a game. Sometimes an elaborate game I suppose.

Sixth, the Stoic Test Frame, is seeing every setback as a test by the Stoic “Gods” of your ability to stay calm and find a workaround.

Toughness Training

This is when we go out of our way to make our circumstances take a turn for the worst so we can expand our comfort zone.

This subject is one I found particularly interesting since in a minor way climbing a mountain I have not climbed before or even one I have during difficult situations is a form of toughness training. However, the author uses climbing Everest as an example which is way out of my comfort zone.

He says your comfort zone has two dimensions. One is physical and the other emotional. You work on the emotional by facing your fears. Then in the physical dimension you face physical discomfort. Is he talking about cold showers? Maybe. He talks about how he forces himself to go out in cold weather with no coat. I think cold showers are worse or rather best. Take that cold shower every day!

The whole idea is to “expand your comfort zone so you will feel comfortable in a wider range of circumstances.”

Death

My favorite subject! Maybe it is because of my age. I think death and I are becoming friends or at least death is a casual acquaintance these days. The Stoics say you should contemplate your death. Irvine says, “…pause in your daily routine to reflect that no matter what you are doing, there is a chance that the is the last time you will ever do it.”

One visualization I liked was what he calls, “prospective retrospection.” This is when you reflect on the fact that at some point in the future you will look back at this very moment and wish you were there. Think about it. You have lived a long time and now you can’t drive, hike, or maybe even walk very well. You will look back and wish for the past. So do it now so you appreciate the present more.

Bookish Weapon Number Seventeen

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Gary Keller’s book, “The One Thing,” reminds me a lot of Stephen Covey’s book, “First Things First,” but it has its own twist and adds a lot. The idea is keeping your focus on one thing. That gets extraordinary results.

I liked the domino analogy. If you have a line of dominos, then keep hitting the first domino until it falls. The rest is easy.

What Holds Us Back

There are too many distractions and things other than the “me thing” that keep us from focusing. Also there are “untruths” that we base our decisions on. As you have heard, if you hear a lie long enough and frequently enough you believe it.

Keller says there are six lies between you and success. 1) Everything matters equally, 2) Multitasking, 3) A disciplined life, 4) Willpower Is Always on Will-Call, 5) A balanced life, and 6) Big is bad. Then he takes each one apart.

Discipline

This one reached out and slapped me in the face. I pride myself the I am disciplined in some areas of my life, but Keller says, “Success is actually a short race – a sprint fueled by discipline just long enough for habit to kick in and tale over.” Yes, habit! The gym is a habit. Hiking is a habit.

He goes on to say, “In fact, you can become successful with less discipline than you think, for one simple reason: success is about doing the right thing, not about doing everything right.” He says that “When you do the right thing, it can liberate you from having to monitor everything.”

So strong, powerful habits are more important than discipline, but you still need the discipline to get the ball rolling.

A Balanced Life

Let’s take one more of these six lies. Isn’t it good to stay balanced? Don’t be a workaholic! Don’t be an “exercise nut.” Don’t just “go hiking” ALL THE TIME. Keller says the balanced life is a lie.

He says instead of seeking balance, we should be seeking, “purpose, meaning, significance – these are what make a successful life. Seek them and you will most certainly live your life out of balance, crisscrossing an invisible middle line as you purpose your priorities.” Yes!

Consider this. If you are messing around with everything it all gets less attention or as he says, “shortchanged,” and “magic happens at the extremes.” It is the extra long climb that makes a difference.

I like what he says about time in this regard. “When you gamble with time, you may be placing a bet you can’t cover….toying with time will lead you down a rabbit hole with no way out. Believing this lie does its harm by convincing you to do things you shouldn’t and stop doing things you should.” Then, “To achieve an extraordinary result you must choose what matters most and give it all the time it demands. This requires getting extremely out of balance in relation to all other work issues, with only infrequent counterbalancing to address them.” Good advice!