Stay on Offense Climb Mountains

Attacking Adversity

Bookish Weapon Number Thirty-Six

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Gary John Bishop is an interesting character and the author of the book, “Stop Doing That Sh*t.” It is a self-help book. You wouldn’t pick it up unless you thought you needed to help your self in some way, especially if you thought you needed to stop doing something.

It is a book that approaches self-sabotage in a different light than what I have read in the past. It is not for everybody. There is, of course, lots of bad language and he doesn’t apologize for that. After all, he also wrote the book, “Unfu*k Yourself.”

The Dedication

I liked his dedication. How many of you just skip over a dedication in a book. It isn’t what you are after or so you think. However, I thought it was well said in this case so I will share.

“I dedicated this book to the helpless and hopeless, the frustrated and defeated: today is a day when it can all begin anew. I don’t care about your past, and you shouldn’t either.”

Good, right? So if you are helpless and hopeless this book might be one you should read. But you say you have lots of hope! Hope that your car doesn’t break down again because you can’t afford to get it fixed, Hope that you can pay the rent. Hope you don’t get sick. You get the gist of this, lots of hope. Right!

Your Center

Bishop calls it your core and asks what is at the core of every human. His answer is “bullshit.” That’s pretty original and a lot different than other answers you would get from self-help gurus.

I really liked what he says about self-talk. “Your self-talk is the locker room of your life.” And he goes on to elaborate:

“People are little more than a living conversation, both internal and spoken. A dialogue in a body. A skin-and-bone bag that talks, and it talks about everything, and the limit of that talk is the limit of that life. Period.” The bold is mine. He says it is not the horrible life you have but the conversation you are having about it that has you by the throat.

Self Sabotage

This is a large part of the book so I will be taking bits and pieces from it. Please read the book if you want to get more out of it.

I liked a quote he reproduces from the writings of Marcus Aurelius’s writings, “The soul becomes dyed with the color of its thoughts.”

There are three saboteurs. “The three saboteurs are the fundamental conclusions you have come to about yourself, other people in your life, and life itself.”

The Question

Bishop asked himself the question, “Why is my life the way it is?” It is a decent question. Have you asked it yourself? Maybe your life is perfect. If so Bishop would ask why you were reading his book. Anyway, he came up with some reasons.

He says that if you want to accomplish some things you have to get used to see other things. He puts it this way, “Whatever you are out to accomplish in this life, you’ll have to get more than a little okay with the experience of struggle or hell, even overwhelm.”

Also, he claims that those who survive are those that are the best predictors. “Every Monday morning is the same because you are already predicting how it will go before it even starts.” He says you have an opinion about how everything is going to go. Your subconscious is responsible.

I like what he says here. “Circumstances may change, but what stays the same is how you see them, as well as how you deal with them and ultimately how you participate in life.” He goes on, “Your entire life to this point has been a series of actions subconsciously driven to trap you in the same bubble of life.”

He says your “subconscious is working you like a sock puppet.” I thought that was pretty funny. He says people are more concerned with fixing themselves than improving themselves.

The Three Saboteurs

You have a way your subconscious views yourself, other people and life. Bishop takes you through the steps find our what those are for you. These are your established truths. I liked that part of the book.

He says, “You? You’re victimizing yourself into a truly forgettable life. Like most people, you’d rather explain your life than intervene in it.” “Your actions are always in alignment with your conclusions.” Of course, he is talking about your conclusions regarding yourself, other people and life. He goes on, “Day after day, week after week, year after year, you see yourself in the same way, you see others in a very distinct way and you see life in the same way you always see it. Talk about predictable.”

He says you form these conclusions in your first two decades of life. Twenty is fifty-four years ago for me. I can’t remember what conclusions I had come to at that time. I think for me the most negative conclusions about these three things came much later in life.

Once you dig down and discover what these are for you, he tells you that you can’t change it. And here is where we disagree. He says the solution is to focus only on the future and do what your future tells you to do. What? Maybe that’s good for younger people but not when you are creeping up on the average life expectancy.

However, the book has some great insights about life so I highly recommend it.

Go Hiking And Attack Adversity

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What are you doing when you go hiking, but attacking adversity? Every log, rock, even every step is an adversary. You have to overcome them. Subdue them. Conquer them. Attack them!

Being on offense is key to climbing a mountain. It is faster too!

The Trail

Every trail is different and has its own challenges. Attacking it needs to be nuanced according to its particular obstacles. Any offense needs tactics. If the hardest part of the hike is the last two miles you might want to conserve your strength.

Alpinists say it is one thing to get to the top of a mountain, but you need to remember that you are going to have to have energy left to get back down the mountain. This isn’t such a big problem when you are going on a typical hike, but it is something to keep in mind.

The Weather

When it is cold and the snow is blowing, how do you keep yourself from just turning around and heading for the car? You do it by having that offensive mindset. You beat that cold into submission.

It also helps to have the proper clothing. When it is cold you do not want to overdress. If you do it will cause you to sweat and then you will get even colder. Actually, on shorter hikes, it doesn’t matter as much because you won’t be out in it the long.

As I have said before be sure to have cold-weather gear like Yaktraks or Microspikes. Most mountains do not require regular Crampons.

The Mindset

You need to be ready for anything the mountain can throw at you. Mentally ready! It is a mindset. Get yourself psyched up for the hike. It is just like a motivational rally where people are standing on their seats chanting or singing, but it is all inside your head.

How to do this? Use triggers. Find something simple like preparing for the hike. Looking at your pack, your boots. Getting everything set up. That is what triggers me. Then it is game on.

Go hiking!

Bookish Weapon Number Thirty-Five

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You are saying you never heard of this book? Well, not many copies were sold. Quite a few were given away. The author, me, has decided to review it three years after it was written. Al little self-promotion doesn’t hurt once in a while.

Why would I want to do that? After all, if you read the review maybe you will figure you don’t need to buy the book. Well, I just thought it would be fun and I didn’t get many reviews on Amazon. Primarily because I was unable to afford to promote it.

There are four strategies for overcoming adversity in this book, all of which I used to get through difficult times in the past. They are so simple, but like everything, not easy.

Exercise

This is, of course, basic, but not many do it. Recent studies have found that exercise is just as effective as Zoloft. That is why it is critical if you are facing adversity.

If you hate it and I have talked to people that really hate it, you can still make it a habit. I hate brushing my teeth. It’s boring, but I, like most of us have made it a habit. By the way, get the book “Atomic Habits” or “Tiny Habits. Both will help you eliminate bad habits and add good ones like exercise. If you are primarily visual get the “Tiny Habits” book. Maybe you will lose some weight too if that is what you want.

Diet

However, you won’t lose much weight exercising! Diet is eighty percent of weight loss. Again this is basic. If your diet is all out of wack you will not be as effective dealing with adversity. My book discusses various diets in what I thought was an attempt at humor.

The reality is that the best diet is personal. It should be based on your genetics and your ancestry. Northern Europeans do better with some foods than people from South America and visa versa. Get a genetic test done and then find out what is best for you. When I was going through my difficulties none of this was available. I went on a strict vegan diet, which helped but I ruined my health long term because I did not supplement.

Therapy

If you are struggling in life then chances are you need to talk about it. Therapy is expensive. If you are homeless or just broke it is not an option for you, right? Wrong! In the book, I talk about this and how I found “free” therapy.

For those of you that are not penniless, you could consider a more conventional form of therapy. However, you could still use the one I suggest in the book. Either way, get some!

Journaling

This has been discussed so much in the last year or so in book after book. I discovered it on my own during my struggles. I detail my method in the book, but it is basically getting your feelings down on paper. Do it every day! It will help you deal with any depression you might experience.

Journaling will also give you a method of comparing the present to the past to see how you have changed or not.

Quotes

I love quotes and the book is in some ways a just a series of quotes. At the end of the book, I have five pages dedicated to quotes from Louis L’Amour, the famous western novelist. They were compiled by his daughter and arranged by subject. I think this may be the best part of the book.

So now you don’t need to read the book, but if your curious head on over to Amazon and order it. Thanks!

Go Hiking And Be A Searcher

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“Searcher,” is a name that James Kavanaugh originated for the groups of people he had in his workshops. Now there are many other names for people like this. Maybe “seekers” or “travelers, or “the enlightened.”

As you have probably guessed by now almost everything in my life revolves around hiking. So why wouldn’t you be a searcher, seeker, traveler or enlightened when you go hiking? It seems natural enough.

Nature

Once again, nature is the answer to many things. When you are hiking you are in touch with your nature and nature itself. You are searching for the top. It is up there somewhere. Just keep looking. Of course, it might help if you pick up your pace a little!

Nature reminds you of how insignificant you are in the big scheme of things. This way your perspective on life is more balanced. After all, you are no big deal and I am no big deal. Yet, we are a part of the cosmos.

Inner Being

Kavanaugh says his “searchers” are people focused on their inner being. Certainly, when you are hiking alone there is much time for inner reflection. So this is another reason hikers are “searchers.”

Once I wrote a song while climbing a mountain. You can get a lot done when you focus inward.

Living In the Present

This is another section in the book which is certainly talked about incessantly these days. When you are hiking you better be present or you find yourself sprawled across the trail.

Present conditions in the mountains dictate how you prepare. Your present physical state dictates how fast you will get to the top.

If you are a hiker, how many times have you enjoyed the breeze blowing against your face or even the cold clinging to your nose? If you haven’t noticed these things start to do so. When you’re dead you won’t be able to feel the breeze anymore. Take advantage of that ability now!

Bookish Weapon Number Thirty-Four

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The book “Search,” was published in 1985, but had a great impact on me at the time and I believe it is a bookish weapon you too can use in life.

It is a summary of what he was teaching at his workshops at the time. Janes Kavanaugh was a Catholic Priest and a poet and a writer who taught what he believed. I read this book the first time right after my first divorce.

Present Feelings

“When we deny strong feelings as I did for twenty or thirty years, they take their toll at some point in bodily symptoms, disease, depression, or consistent unhappiness,” says Kavanaugh. He talks about a young woman he saw at the store and how she looked sad and in despair, but would not communicate it to anyone. “She will dream of some magical solution, seek her release in novels or movies or the soaps, and join the parade of the empty and miserable.”

He discusses how “Searchers” are different than the woman above. They want to live a life that reflects who they are and are aware of danger signs of suppressed feelings. He says, “Self-healing begins with an awareness of what we are feeling. To know our feelings without editing or qualifying, without classifying them as good or bad.”

Kavanaugh says, if our image of ourselves refuses us the right to be angry or even unpleasant, our own kindness will probably kill us. Or if our self-image prevents us from being gentle and soft and even afraid, we will wall ourselves off from the world in a private tomb.” “…corroded feelings are the great murderers,” says Kavanaugh. He just says we should be aware of our feelings and that “Search” can teach us to grow up and take responsibility for our present feelings, to “get rid of the ghosts.”

Dependence and Interdependence (Chapter 2)

This section of the book I underlined over and over. On the subject of dependency, I underlined this: “Many of us are thrown back upon ourselves through a ruptured relationship, a job loss, or poor health. The child in us begs for someone to take the pain away.” “…the dependent child can be a killer!”

He goes on and I underlined this as well: “A solid friendship or committed love is an interdependency wherein we meet one another’s needs. That’s what life is all about. Total independence can b a mask for one who fears any dependence and intimacy. We need each other. We need to reach out, to share the burden of living, to find the helping hand when we are lost and alone.”

Meeting Our Own Needs (Chapter 3)

“Search” continually talks about the “long game”,” about imagining our life a year from now, if we do not take responsibility to meet our own needs. God or an inner spirit speaks to us through our needs.” He makes the point that if you ignore your needs for a lifetime you will end up alone or lonely.

I really liked Kavanaugh’s poetry which is interlaced throughout the book. Here is a bit from the poem, “Personal Freedom.”

“ Stand back from life and observe it at a distance.
What makes sense and what imprisonment?
Who knows consistent freedom and who follows a path
Made by ants following ants in proscribed procession?
I have no idea where I must live or how,
No blueprint made in Japan or heaven,
Only heart and mind that know what is true and false,
And what it is to feel the pulse of freedom,
Without which, for me, there is only a premature death.”

Indecision

When it comes to mental health and indecision. He says, “We can decide to communicate honestly no matter the cost, to begin to be who we are to the extent that we can. There is no deadline, no rule of thumb the covers everyone. Many of us have been taught so intensively to think of others that it takes us years to respond to ourselves.”

Then when people live life under others heal he has this to say, “When we have been put down enough or have suffered enough personal degradation, our anger can be an important ally to rescue us. Often we forget that anger is a powerful part of our emotional makeup and it can save us from self-annihilation. When summoned, anger often enables us to respect who we are and becomes a significant source of self-love.”

Here is a summary of what he is saying about decisions: prolonged indecision can lead to serious illness, decisions follow from unmet needs and practical options, a bad decision is often better than no decision and play the long game. All of these are good to remember.

Loneliness

Personally, I enjoy solitude. I am rarely lonely which is a good thing because I spend most of my time alone. Kavanaugh says, “Loneliness can almost devour the sensitive and aware and cause a deep-rooted fear of abandonment and a diminished sense of self-worth.” He says of single people that, “The freedom they chose becomes another kind of prison.”

I think he makes too much of it. He talks about people exploring meaningless relationships but are still alone. I say enjoy your solitude. It is a precious gift.

Support Systems

One of the key parts of this book is when he discusses support systems. He says and I agree, that, “…the essence of a support system is to establish genuine and solid strength within oneself.” This is so important. If I did not have this strength I would not have made it this far.

Beginning again, say after a divorce or even a breakup is difficult. I like his poem about it:

I cannot begin again
To study the veins of granite rocks
And explore the anxiety of clouds
To relearn the secrets of the trees
And see the shadows of mountains.
There are too may forms already seen,
Too many sounds heard too often,
Too many dreams etched in my memory like water scarring ancient foundations.

This is not all of the poem. You need to find the book and read it. If you can’t find the book, let me know and I will give you the rest of it in one of these posts.

Go Hiking and Be Focused

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Focus is important in life and its no different on the trail. You need to pay attention to where you put your feet unless you want to end up on your face or back.

Once you have reached the top of a mountain you can relax and enjoy the scenery. Still, what if a cougar crept up behind you? Not good.

The Wide View

There are two kinds of vision you can use in the mountains which keep you focused in different ways. The first is the wide view. Don’t just focus on one thing, but take in the entire scene in from to of you and around you. It is a different way of seeing but useful.

With the wide view, you are scanning for danger and enjoying the differences in forest. You are very present in the moment so it is like a meditation.

The Narrow View

With this view, your eyes are focused on one thing. Usually, this is why you are climbing around an obstacle or scrambling up a rock face. You have to focus your vision or you will fall.

The narrow view is also useful in swatting mosquitoes. This reminds me that I have not seen mosquitoes in the mountains these last couple of years. I wonder why? Maybe I have just been fortunate and had a breeze blowing. But no, there are fewer birds too. Maybe it is civilization being too close.

The Inner View

If you are hiking a relatively easy terrain, which does happen during a hike, then take some time to go inside. Focus on your feelings at the moment. Focus on how your body feels. Focus on your breath. Focus on how you are doing mentally. Pray!

If you are someone who rarely takes the time to examine your life, this is an excellent opportunity to do that. You may discover things you didn’t know about yourself.

So go hiking and be focused!